Sat 18 Aug 2007
Description of the expression “elephant in the room”: it refers to a situation where something major is going on, it’s on everyone’s mind and impossible to ignore — like an elephant in the room. But nobody talks about the “elephant” because nobody knows what to do about it.
For example, Uncle Nimrod is busily getting drunk again at the family Thanksgiving dinner. There’s going to be a drunken scene. But everyone feels powerless and choses to ignore his behavior.
That is how I see AGBell…the elephant in the Deaf room. View the vlog for more details.
August 18th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Ella, good job to educate us. Alright, it is time to have an unity together. GO ASL GO ASL GO ASL GO.
August 18th, 2007 at 12:30 pm
Wow…awesome view on this! Thanks!! Get out, elephant! Let us push the wall down!!
deafk
August 18th, 2007 at 12:39 pm
Thanks for this wonderful vlog.
It is getting tiresome when we finally address the issues that are overdue, these deficit thinkers are quick to shoot us down while these very same people do and say nothing about the real issues that affect deaf children/people. They continue to enable these people and the system. The result we see with MANY deaf children/people is obvious that the system has failed.
It is like they don’t want to give Deaf community the credit for genuinely wanting to empower the parents with balanced information that has been lacking for centuries. The Deaf community wants nothing more to become their allies, to ensure that none of deaf children fall through the crack, and work together against the system that exploits.
The elephant is better off in the wild, not in something that’s so artifical, and let us all heal.
August 18th, 2007 at 12:42 pm
Very good points!
August 18th, 2007 at 12:59 pm
That is exactly! what I have been fighting for! we have invest our energy, time against each others… we are supposed to support each other just like Deaf Films, Deaf theatre, Deaf Art, we need unity, we need to help each other businesses not just ignore each other, look at hearies “art” they made million and million of dollars! why? they help each other, audience go to their films, buy their arts.
what you explained PERFECT CLEARLY POINTS! we must, no no THIS IS AN ORDER, we have to push the elephant out! tear down the walls!
that’s why I am showing my “example” of art, acting, films to the deaf community, let them “come out” their skills and do not FEAR!!! time for deaf people to show us! I can’t do it alone!
Thank you Ella!!! I admired you so much!!
hugs
Gary
August 18th, 2007 at 1:10 pm
very true. I was there and i am still going through with deaf people today! I work up to get all unity of deafhood!
August 18th, 2007 at 1:20 pm
Very good analogy!
August 18th, 2007 at 1:32 pm
Luv it. Throw that elephant out of our room! Have to think differently away from internalized oppression, true true. New perspective for many of us, me included. Thanks.
August 18th, 2007 at 1:54 pm
Ella…
You said it beautifully… Once we open our eyes to the system, our lives will be enriching. As an observant, I see the true color. DBC works very hard, delicates their free time, and makes sure Deaf children access to their natural language and best quality of live and education. — However it breaks my heart to see some people trying to pull down DBC. People in DBC are true pro-active people. They are not just talkers. They are do-ers.
I am so excited that David Eberwein and Barbara DiGiovanni will be sharing their recent experiences (at the AG Bell protest in Arlington, VA) and DBC’s plans. It will be at Friday, August 24th at 7 pm in San Leandro at the Deaf Community Center. Please give my best to them.
)
I am so proud of DBC that had formed and still is growing. DBC is a true heart to Deaf children and Deaf babies. If people have some concerns, please try to be a healthy communicator.
It is sad to see that some people would put down and mocks on Deaf people’s English writing. It tells me that they are stuck in dysconcious condition. They didn’t realize many hearing people can’t write English very well and yet it was their first language.
I am so proud of John Ebgert for his wonderful job with his very first book, for his courage to publish his book and for his action to distribute his book. He did do his self-marketer with his book. I admire him. He inspires me so much. Not anyone can write a book and finish it. I am not talking about Deaf people. I am talking about hearing people. I know many many hearing people never finish their books or they continue babbling about writing a book. It cost thousands of dollars to hire the editor and yet John did it all himself with some of his peers’ and family members’ help. Oh my god…. He’s an amazing person.
To those Deaf people who have issues with people like us who value Deaf and ASL: MY suggestion to them is to please look at a bigger picture. We don’t have time for this unhealthy situation. Important, we work together to make sure our Deaf children access to best education, ASL, and identity of Deaf as possible. It takes the village to raise a Deaf child.
)
Aidan
August 18th, 2007 at 2:00 pm
I like your analogy. You gave a good one. I have noticed lately that many accused AGB for causing division in the Deaf community or why they behaved toward other deaf individuals in the past. Their accusation is mostly true but we are all responsible for our actions. We can’t accuse AGB for everything we do to each other. Our actions may come from different reasons…some are just being very mean people…some hate themselves for who they are and they project their hatred on others, some may have low self esteem and on and on. I hope this will not lead individuals to think that AGB is solely responsible for their actions or division. I hope you see what I mean here.
August 18th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
That is awesome presentation you have! Do not let elephants barrier and control you from your own life. Because Elephants think to be perfectist! No way, do not let elephants walk over your heads!
GO DEAF POWER GO ASL GO DEAF WORLD GO PEACE WITH DEAF COMMUNITY’S WISHING!
August 18th, 2007 at 2:07 pm
Oppps…I forgot to remove the word “other”
August 18th, 2007 at 2:25 pm
WOW, a great message you have in here… Thank you for sharing!
August 18th, 2007 at 2:30 pm
I will let my Blue Ox ramming the elephant out of the wall!
yes, go for it!
rod t.
August 18th, 2007 at 2:44 pm
Very good! My husband Uzi and I just watched your narration. As an Israeli Jewish who grew up with very rich literature, he said, wow, your analogue is excellent. It nails straight for once.
About putting down on others, I agree however sometimes I see someone making an attempt that does not look right or that I feel it does not reflect us to the highest idealogy it needs to be, either say nothing or just offer constructive feedback. What I saw in DeafDC this morning, it went too far and yes I shot because I was frustrated.
Thanks, very good one!!
August 18th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
Hear! Hear! Hear! Er– I mean, See! See! See!
Ella, you vlog once in a hwile. Each time you do one, it is always priceless. Much better than MasterCard’s advertisements!
It is time to push the elephant out of the room. It is annoying to see some Deaf people fighting against eahc other instead of pushing for the wall to break down and move on.
Cheers,
R-
August 18th, 2007 at 3:03 pm
Penny:
I agree that we are responsible for our actions. What we need to do is channel our energies positively to educate the public about the Deaf Bilingual Coalition and why it is important to expose deaf babies ASL just like hearing babies are, especially when it is their only exposure to language expressively and receptively after birth.
For the longest time, there was no balance of power with AGBAD getting away with murder when it has influenced the systems and the medical establishment, which are the ones who reach to the parents of a deaf baby first. This is not what I call a democracy. The Deaf community has been the most inclusive than any other groups. With proactivism from the Deaf community and it will take a lot of effort, time and money, it will make it hard for AGBAD to monopolize.
History will show that AGBAD is the cause of many, if not all, problems today. After the Milan Conference with the banning of sign language promoted by AGBell, nothing is the same anymore. Deaf people were better educated and literate back then than today. Also, a lot of deaf people taught at deaf schools, but we do not see that now.
August 18th, 2007 at 3:10 pm
wow! powerful points and 100% agree!
August 18th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
You’re wonderful….I agree with you TRUE! Good Points one!
Bless with you!
August 18th, 2007 at 4:08 pm
Ella,
Well-said! I was kinda of taken back with Deaf Pundit’s blog and Deaf DC blog but then again it is typical of oralists versus ASLer’s who are literally fighting against each other, audism gets in the way and all that.
Many times, I’ve heard from a lot of certain deafies when there is a problem, “We don’t need to talk about it, forget about the past, stop obsessing, you don’t understand, all that”, then we start to feel more and more oppressed than ever. I’ve been there many times before and it is extremely frustrating.
I think what we are entering in this kind of dialogue is extremely healthy and good for us to acknowledge each other and what we have been suffering over the years. All of sudden, we are feeling understood and acknowledged by people who did not realize what we have been through while growing up. This is a therapy of in-kind thing. Then someone like Deaf Pundit turns around and tells us to stop talking about it, then we are back to square one.
As for hearing parents, so far I have seen some hearing parents disagreeing what we have been saying, they keep saying that their deaf child is doing very well and they are not even listening to us or taking us in account. Only very few hearing parents are really listening to us. This is rather unfortunate and sad. Too many hearing parents think that we are wrong! Simple as it is.
August 18th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
Ella,
Whoa. I feel your anger and frustrations across the screen.
Yeah…not just an elephant but a white elephant, too. You have it right that they professionals just exploit us and reap in the benefits off us. If they promote ASL, that would take away their livihood. Time for us to take back what belongs to us.
August 18th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
Your vlog really resonates with me since I’m the product of a residential school for the deaf, and as an adult see the amount of damage done to deaf children via cochlear implanting AND being deliberately denied access to ASL because the AVT people feel ASL would interfere with their English development. DUH!!! I see more and more deaf CI children end up in kindergarten with little to no language (ASL or English or any other language). This is assimilation at its worst.
August 18th, 2007 at 5:41 pm
Hi, whew, I felt better knowing now that what this Deaf DC was not doing any good to us. I read the fourth paragraphs, and I said, whoa, that was too much… why should I keep up reading… gotta go to another v/blog…
Now, after reading those comments, I know why you mentioned this awesome story. Thanks again, smile.
deafk
August 18th, 2007 at 5:43 pm
Michele, I think Deaf Pundit wanted to explain how we can better enhance our rhetoric skills and tactics still lacking in eye of public. She came up with good explanation of how smart ones won even in my opinion, in pretty devious ways, which I do find it not really my style. I do not like to lie, I do not like to try to infilterate, I do not like to blackmail whatever. But there are some who do these tactics that work. That is something for us to think about as individual and group which tactics we can use.
It is worthwhile examining her proposal although we do not have to take everything what she says. We just figure out given options what we can choose and do our best. We have to get smart. We have to, like for a good example, if a hearing sees a statement saying “All deaf babies must be proficient in ASL and English” oppopsed to “Deaf children are born to be bilingual”. Which statement will most people listen to?
August 18th, 2007 at 5:53 pm
Hi Ella
I full agreed with you, I have fed up with deaf community. Deaf people are critical of deaf personal, not focus to politics and challenges of govermment. I was thinking about improve deaf community.
betty
August 18th, 2007 at 6:02 pm
Ella,
Wow! Very powerful message. I am hoping the elephant will be let out of the room and taken back to the zoo. Then elephant will be on reverse side of the bars, and Deaf people will be out free to roam and enjoy life as it is meant to be.
Thanks for posting this.
August 18th, 2007 at 6:17 pm
That is very powerful rhetoric! I like that that is very good metaphor! Who will bring a mouse in that room where the elephant in Deaf room? That is only one way we need to stir up for political purpose for our cause!
August 18th, 2007 at 6:33 pm
Beautifully well-signed analogy! You gave us strenght to roll up our sleeves and do something because I will get back on action with our Deaf community again.
Judy
August 18th, 2007 at 6:50 pm
JWD! (Job Well Done!) Your frustration is as many as others. WHat are the latest strageties on tossing out the very old over hundered year old Elephant from the room?
What are the suggestions and ideas in making this happen? Should we write letters asking Department of Education to stop funding AGB programs? Make DBC an offical organization with paid employees? Should National Association of the Deaf be involved and make noise about our language? What can we do to get the locals being involved in this?
What are the priorities right now with AGB? Make an appointment with local chapters of AGB and discuss with them? Go nation with AGB?
American Sign Language is designed for who? Universities and college classroom? I have been seeing a lot of this lately. Should we change Deaf Education majors all over the country to Bilingual Education in ASL and English?
There are many issues that need to be confronted nationwide among the deaf communities including that old Elephant.
August 18th, 2007 at 7:02 pm
Ella, Two Thumbs Up…you are so absolutely right. I wish I could say more but am afraid I might start WWIII.
August 18th, 2007 at 7:04 pm
Katherine-
I agree everything what Ella shared here. I love her analogy. We owe Mr. Egbert and others who passed out flyers to hearing parents and visitors to encourage them to communicate with their Deaf babies in ASL. I have a great passion to join this fight with you and everyone. I agree our country has allowed AGB to take control for many years. Deaf Political leaders did nothing for a long time until the fisherman (Mr. Egbert) came forth. Bless him. We are finally taking action and we are not going to give it up until AGB allow babies to sign. I agree with Mr. Egbert that taking away ASL from babies is against human rights and we should fight all the way. I have written two poems about children with cochlear implants. I am still making some changes and I hope to share with readers one day. What I meant with my comment above is that I wanted us to be careful how we word it—like accusing AGB for causing us to behave certain ways…i.e. talking against each other, putting each other down and things like that. I agree AGB has divided our community but we are still responsible how we treat others. I don’t want to encourage audience to say I did this because of AGB…I treated this person because of AGB…it is not my fault for hurting people because AGB made me that way…making inexcusable behaviors. This is what I was trying to say above. Thanks for bringing it up and give me another opportunity to explain it better.
August 18th, 2007 at 9:05 pm
Everybody,
Seems to me what Mishka Zena said upon returning from the AGBell/AVT conference end of July points to the core of the problem…LACK OF RESPECT for Deaf people (I add “especially DeafMutes and ASL”). It hurts but it hurts more when OUR own people do not respect each other when we make belittling comments about each other, and make decisions benefitting individuals without giving caring consideration if they would affect our fellow Deaf people.
Penny and Katherine, you discussed being accountable for own actions and not blame AGBell for all problems. To a degree, I agree, especially on the personal level. BUT when we figure how to deal with the SYSTEM, the more I think about it and the clearer I see things, I am convinced Dr Paddy Ladd is right when he said colonialism applies to Deaf community and many many of our problems can be directly related to the Oralism colonialism.
As Darlene Ewan and others point out, each of us need to start or continue to decolonize our community starting with ourselves and how we view other Deaf people and ASL itself.
And stop focusing our energies on criticizing those who have ventured further in the direction to rid of the elephant. We need to focus on criticizing and challenging these who caused the elephant to be in the room. Most definitely WE the Deaf people DID NOT put the elephant there altho we did try to appease it too often.
August 18th, 2007 at 9:19 pm
Let me share with you how sad story is. I have deaf step cousin who has a CI. Back in 1992 I heard from my late aunt saying that my cousin decided to put CI on my deaf step cousin when he was 12 years old. I said NO NO NO to my cousin. I did explain to my late aunt that if my deaf step cousin be middle of between Hearing and Deaf world therefore he may be confusing who he is identited himself. They did not listen what I tried to tell them. They went ahead to put him on a surgery for CI.
I found out that they attended to ABG convention in Chicago between 1991 or 1992.
When my aunt passed away, I saw my deaf step cousin there at the funeral, I signed in ASL to him. He did nothing to know ASL but can’t understand lipreading and hearing sounds. I shocked how it is sad that he missed opportunity!
I can see why every hearing parents of deaf children wants to do something on their deaf children without their happiness. They can’t understand the reality of the deaf world they may become. I feel like they did not give them an opportunity to get involving in the deaf world, but I am sure they are not happy what or who they are!
August 18th, 2007 at 9:43 pm
CFM: I understand your predicament but your comments is what Ella has been saying … we are afraid of this, that and there because we have this enormous elephant in the room stomping us all over.
Stand up and say what is on your mind, dear.
R-
August 18th, 2007 at 10:21 pm
Hello Ella Mae:
I fully agree with you about “elephant” in room. We need to pull together and become one force to “blast” elephant out of room!
That elephant reeks of audism! We need to put it out of business by kicking it out of our room!
Kudos to Ella Mae for good analogy!
Hope Ella Mae and the team will come to Missouri someday!
Thanks for the great work!
=)
August 18th, 2007 at 10:28 pm
Ella is RIGHT about lack of respect I have seen serious problem with number of our Deaf Community very very deep dividing-BABEL. Accordingly to Old Testament in BIBLE! It is all about Babel Tower! I do BLAME on the colonalism that already creates the system that keeps oppressing in ourselves. I do not like very much! FREEDOM is your CHOICe to fight the system! Stop making a finger point each other of our Deaf COmmununity. ASL and Deafmute people already know the truth. AGBAD enjoys watching us into blaming and expressing lack of respect, I said NO!!! Only We, Deaf Community can change the system! Let us find a common groud which means fighting against the system!” But overall, a young person’s opinions will almost always be illogical or emotional- or both. Ergo,it’s foolish for us to blah out strong opinions on issues we know little about!”
August 19th, 2007 at 12:55 am
Wow, Ella! Truer words have never been signed! Thanks for making this vlog! I hope you’ll make more vlogs soon because I’ve enjoyed watching you on your soapbox!
August 19th, 2007 at 2:06 am
Well Said ! 100%
August 19th, 2007 at 5:33 am
Awesome vlog, Ella! I think material like this should be turned into a documentary and saved on DVD.
To add to one of your points – that deaf people are erroneously accused of “forcing” hearing parents towards ASL – I agree with you. Here’s some additional perspective on that:
Never, ever… EVER has anyone forced ASL or Deaf culture on me.
But I was forced, totally against my will, to go to the ENT to have my ears examined. Many times.
I was forced, too many times to count, to go to the audiologist and sit in a booth that I hated. (”Say the word… ‘airplane’…”)
I was forced to wear hearing aids.
I was forced to take speech therapy.
All of the above against my will.
But not once, not ever, did anyone ever force me to learn ASL or interact with the Deaf community (in fact, for several years I was told to avoid both).
And then, years later, when I eventually learned to appreciate ASL and Deaf culture, of course I was (and still am) always happy to share how much it means to me. Politefully, tactfully, and with respect for other people’s perspectives. (If anything, people have said that I’m “too nice,” often to a fault.)
Yet when I share how much ASL and Deaf culture mean to me, I’ve actually been called… Deaf militant. Go figure.
That elephant gotta go.
Great work, Ella!
Keep it up.
Best regards,
Drolz
August 19th, 2007 at 6:46 am
Interesting.
After viewing your powerful message, I looked up again at your head image of vlog, the lime-green tunnel with the car with headlight on. Your logo name, “Ella’s Flashlight.”
I said wow. I have seen that last several times, the beautiful and unusual design. It has something in there, the meaning behind it.
Till then, I saw it like us like cars without headlight on driving around and around in the tunnel, stuck in the colonialism.
With Ella’s flashlight… “Ah, we ought to turn the light on and watch for the end of the tunnel to the freedom and equal rightful happy as everybody else.
cb
August 19th, 2007 at 9:32 am
response in video
August 19th, 2007 at 10:16 am
I have been thinking of your presentation on vlog, “ABG: Elephant in the deaf rooms” Your richly educating is influenced my thoughtful of what our deaf mute stands for and against ABG.
Right now I am still thinking about writing to ABG how I feel about my deaf step cousin who has CI on after his parents learned from ABG convention. Since both me and my deaf step cousin have not communication each other is because he is oral and know nothing about ASL and I am profoundly deaf and frequently ASL. Since he is in hearing world and do not know much about the deaf culture. Come on, he needs to know more about the deaf world and culture if his CI does not work, where is back up?? ASL IS BACK UP!!!!!!!!!
August 19th, 2007 at 10:17 am
Also one thing to tell you, I will let you know when I will hear from ABG after I will send a letter to ABG sooner. I make my determine to stand up and voice for the Mute Deaf’s truth!
August 19th, 2007 at 11:28 am
Im very agree with you with 100% Get out off Elephant Room!!
August 19th, 2007 at 11:34 am
Yay! You got it right, Ella!
August 19th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Jon,
LOVE your response as always! yeah, we need to figure out how to be mice. We gotta hurry because the elephant can only grow bigger and bigger and eventually squash everybody in the Deaf room. I believe the elephant entered the Deaf room in 1880 as a big baby but small enough to go through the doorway. Now its too big to exit the same way, so we need to figure ways fast to burst open the room, rid of the elephant and BUILD our beautiful HOME!
Thanks Jon. YOu gotta teach me how to respond with video!
August 19th, 2007 at 1:13 pm
as always brilliant commentary ella – thank u again and again
re: the elephant metaphor – many applications
elephant in the room no one wants to discuss
elephant afraid of the wee mouse
great
finally the discussion is taking place about the elephant largely via b/vlogs and politcial peaceful activism – protests etc
another analogy to the elephant might be the story of the 4 blind people who r each feeling a different part of the elephant and coming up with different proclamations of what the object is – they each fail because they do not share and use their information collectively to SEE the whole and they approach the taks form their own POV only without an willingness to see from others POV
http://www.kheper.net/topics/blind_men_and_elephant/Buddhist.html
the importance of this story is the quarell that emerges – how they argue about who’s perception is right etc
this is the danger for the Deaf community presently – do we allow ourselves to continue to be “divided and conquered”
do we continue to appease the elephant as ella mentioned we have done in the past instead of unifying to truthfully examine audism
most important to ella’s vlog is the call to PUSH DOWN THE WALLS
this is the key – the elephant is AUDISM in its many shapes and forms – the walls are the weapons and mechanicism that audism and audist use to ensure that THEY will never have to function in a Deaf-world and Deaf people will forever be charged with trying to “function in a hearing-world” when in fact they do so on a daily basis
there are many ways to push down the wall:
1. letter writing campaign (to All my children as mishka zena called for) and other agencies, depts, groups
2. petitions
3. demonstrations / rallies
4. marches
also it would be grand if some kind of acculturation program for Deaf children could be set up – a sat or sun day program much like Greek School or Chinese School or Hebrew School. such a program could also offer classes and support for hearing parents also
again ella thank u for helping us shift our attention from AT each other to focus on constructive ways to peacefully and positively push down the wall and let the elephant out – this will ensure our own liberation and empowerment instead of being continually doomed to “beating a dead horse”
peace
p
August 19th, 2007 at 2:28 pm
Jon has very excellent common sense! I love it1 The mouse will do but who will feed the mouse? Elephant can run away from the mouse at right place at right time? But As a whole Deaf community will do that like a mouse who will lead Deaf community to take action? Who will have a gut? Someone must have a gut! Give me death or liberty, but liberty stays with my heart!
August 19th, 2007 at 2:28 pm
Ella!
Elephant! Very perceptive and splendidly metaphorical! What is frightening is that AGBell and Gallaudet’s Department of Education have become closely associated through the influence of the Audiology Department! These two departments largely influence the thinking of over 250 hearing graduate students who prepare to teach in residential school for the deaf. Most naturally, results hold that deaf students are brained not to let themselves be educated by deaf teachers!
How do I know? New students arriving at Gallaudet using SEE#2 are culturally shocked to see DEAF teachers. They would ask the departmental chairs that they be transferred from DEAF teachers to HEARING teachers!
“Why?” a departmental chair would ask.
“Because they cannot hear,” a new student would reply.
“Cannot hear what?”
“How can Deaf teachers teach English to us when they cannot hear the English language?”
The idea that Deaf people cannot hear the English language originated at none other than AGBell.
AGBell also profoundly influences baby doctors. “You have a baby boy, but he has no language.” The upset parents ask the doctor what he has meant by “no language”. To which the doctor would reply: “Your baby is deaf. He cannot hear the English language. But he could develop English if you would agree to implant him within six months.”
How will Deaf people debunk AGBell’s theory the way Italy’s Leonardo daVinci’s close friend Renaissance mathematican-physician Geroloma Cardona did? How did Cardona debunk Aristotle’s theory? Clean and simple: Cardona had witnessed intelligence development through none other than his very own deaf son who learned to read and write with his EYES!
AGBell and ENT doctors are a colosssal, gigantic, vast, huge abusers in different forms and shapes. They rake millions of dollars from wealthy parents who are embarrassed to see their deaf children use flying hands for communication as well as from Cochlear Corporate. Of course, some parents would lose an interest in their deaf children for failing oralism after their graduation and avoid their company. The dumped would develop a sense of humilation and low self-esteem.
How to weaken the elephant? Someone called “Deaf Pundit” proposes lawsuits.
Lawsuits? AGBell and Cochlear Corporates would become bankrupt! Faculty in Gallaudet’s Audiology Department would be disgraced! Doctors would no longer be bribed!
August 19th, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Yup…I know your vlog has made an impact on people who viewed it. Let’s hope we will work together and succeed!
August 19th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
Jean:
Several years ago, I had a good talk with this lawyer, who is very prominent in the Deaf community about cochlear corporates and the medical establishment. He did mention about one day representing the members in a class action lawsuit against them. I have faith that he’ll succeed and when it’ll happen? Only time will tell.
August 19th, 2007 at 8:03 pm
Jean and Katherine
I agree with you 100% :0)
August 20th, 2007 at 3:23 am
Ella,
How true it is! Sixteen years ago my hearing daughter was in first grade at elementary school. It was her first time to invite her friends to her birthday party. No one showed up at her party. She came home from school. She told me that her friend’s mother scared the other mothers. They were afraid that my deaf disease would make their daughters to be deaf. Can you believe that?!!! You know what my daughter said to me. “Mom, I am happy you are my deaf mom. You’re my best birthday present than ever.” God Bless her! Guess what, her friends came to celebrate my daughter’s next birthday after I became a member of PTA. Thanks to the elephant for helping me to break the wall!
Your “elephant in the room” is outstanding.
August 20th, 2007 at 7:36 pm
Ella,
Perfect analogy! Why don’t we put mice in the room. See what happened to THE elephant! That will make our perfect DAY!
Deafchip
August 21st, 2007 at 10:59 pm
Ella
Glad to see someone finally say it!
What it really boils down to is this: we have allowed an ‘enemy’ to grow withing our community, fed it lots of hay and worked ourselves to the bone trying to clean up the poop.. and what it do for us? NADA. It just sat there and watched us argue, point fingers, and so forth. The Elephant didn’t have to do a damned thing – except grow fat on our discord.
Time to turn things around (and put the Elephant on the South Beach Diet so we can shove out).
RFW
August 21st, 2007 at 11:38 pm
Rob,
haha. You said it well! But seriously, I have been thinking that if we don’t get the elephant out soon, it will just continue to get fatter and fatter and eventually squash us all. We gotta hurry!
August 21st, 2007 at 11:44 pm
Patti Durr,
likewise, as always, your commentary is great. Everybody, please take note of her recommendations of the kinds of actions Deaf people can take. Those are very empowering actions and collective yet based on individual decisons. We all need to do more of these..peacefully of course, but not necessarily meek or too polite. It’s time to speak out boldly yet respectful. It’s time to be courageous and determined to achieve something BIG for the community. It’s time to also study the experiences, strategies and thinking of other oppressed groups in the past and learn from them. And finally, cant emphasize enough the importance of a VISION based on Deafhood, not based on results of the Oralism Colonialism.
August 23rd, 2007 at 6:54 am
Far-fetched!!!!!
We could work much easier to put a cutsey mouse to scare the elephant. We could not sweat so hard to push the walls. Simply put…put a mouse in the room. No question about the elephant who would leave the room in a jiff.
Who is the cutsey mouse??? Any deafie…. It is a fact that any elephant is scared of any mouse because it becomes paranoid to have it crawl through its trunk.
Sandra
August 30th, 2007 at 5:31 am
Awesome. I love the dialogue happening here. I especially appreciate the TRUE LIFE examples people are sharing here (such as Dora’s “Guess what, her friends came to celebrate my daughter’s next birthday after I became a member of PTA. Thanks to the elephant for helping me to break the wall!” and Jean Boutcher’s “How do I know? New students arriving at Gallaudet using SEE#2 are culturally shocked to see DEAF teachers. They would ask the departmental chairs that they be transferred from DEAF teachers to HEARING teachers!”)
Thank you Ella (and all your responders) for creating a space for true dialogue to happen. I agree that there is colonialism going on here in our Deaf World. If you look at history, the men and women who first came and settled into the first 13 colonies were all hard working people, minding their own business, eager to start their new lives away from an oppressive England where they could practice their own religious beliefs. Only a few rabble rousers started a “Congress” in the 13 colonies and started pointing out that everyone was paying an awful lot of taxes across the ocean but no one was listening to them! Of course, today we honor and revere these rabble rousers (you know who they were? Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, Daniel Webster, etc.)
Ella, you are our Benjamin Franklin! (Remember, he invented the first press machine in America, and was able to publish a lot of flyers.) You go, girl!
August 30th, 2007 at 6:17 am
I just thought about this.
Elephant in a small room signifies what is harmful and unnatural when it comes to our own existence. Releasing the elephant back to the wild is not only good for the elephant but also liberates us. Those people, in which the elephant represents, consumed with greed and power forgot what it is like to be carefree and not interfere with the nature.
January 28th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
Agree! I have been in the same situation since I was a youth. I always inform Deaf community to unite and educate them that hearing parents of Deaf children are not blamed. They just listen to medical people. They need our ASL experts and your experiences that you can share.
Deaf community seems to be blind for a long time. Hopefully, Like Ella, David E and GG especially Dr. Ladd we, Deaf should continue our sleeves up to promote Deafhood methods to the public. We should respect and welcome Deaf and HH people who already are in the wrong placement such as oral, CI,etc.
Remember hearing parents and others still think Deaf people limit their functions in A to L life way,but we show them our function in A to Z life way. Take care! Peace out!
January 31st, 2008 at 12:43 pm
I agree with you 100% No doubts without reservations!
Waving my hands!
February 5th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Ella, Awesome… your point of view is true ! so let’s rolling !
February 6th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
Ella Mae Lentz,
As I watched your vlog, hairs raised on my arms, back and neck! I absolutely agree that we MUST focus on the elephant and stride confidently foward to PUSH it out of the room, as a team effort. Also want to say that I’m tired of the word “militant”.
To date, every “militant” I have met is simply an extremely passionate Deaf person, albeit sometimes misguided or frustrated. If it takes a militant to take action against the AGBAD elephant, so be it and let EVERY one of us be one, as well.
Let’s act now- the time’s ticking away for a Deaf child, and that’s constantly on my mind every day I’m in law school, fighting towards the day I can graduate and say, “This is the day I can make a legal difference in the Deaf Education and Family Law field for all Deaf children.” Until then, I will continue to seek ways to be involved with NAD, DBC, and any other grassroots movement. Anything for our Deaf kids. Be militant, Be Deaf, Be an elephant-pusher!
February 20th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
That’s interesting video for everyone. I agreed with Ella because what she talks about the deaf people’s value than AGBell. That Ella’s video gonna be awesome what I hear about her statement. It is very important for our deaf world to make a fair with hearing world. Both of deaf world and hearing world should be having along good together in the future. It doesn’t matter for me to be on both of deaf and hearing world.
By the way, I don’t like AGBell’s idea against those deaf people which he just had booted deaf people with ASL away. It was not great idea and just protect our deaf world’s value, community, and culture away from AGBell’s elephant. Last thing is to PROTECT their own right and what they want. That is not belong to AGBell! Let’s keep it up, Ella!
March 2nd, 2008 at 6:22 am
[...] reflections inspired by Ella’s “AGBell: Elephant in the Deaf Room” http://www.ellasflashlight.com/?p=37 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rujmvxho0_8 [...]
March 25th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
What wonderful thoughts! I am a hearing parent of a six year-old Deaf boy. I am so fortunate to have wonderful Deaf people in my life who have been so accepting of our family’s process of understanding our son’s needs. They have provided kind and honest guidance and demonstrated the willingness to be part of our journey. I would love to see Deaf parents have more mentorship from Deaf adults regarding communication options, social, emotional and educational needs of their child, etc.